It's Not about Love, It's Not About What We Want; It's about the Law and All Humans' Rghts

So today was a day that will go down in the annuls of history.

Today Friday, June 26, 2015 the Supreme Court ruled 5-4 that gay marriage is now legal.

And I'm supposed to be happy. At least that's what everyone tells me. I'm young and so therefore I must be jumping up and down at this huge step for love.

I just feel more like the it's still soaking in and I can't quite believe it. Instead of realizing how historic it is and being blown away by it, I'm just walking around like it hasn't soaked in, feeling like it's Freaky Friday.

I mean I guess the family members can come out of the closet now... but were they really in the closet? Maybe they came out a long time ago. I mean I knew about it when I was like a teenager. And I never heard of them really hiding it. Just more or less it was just one aspect of their multifaceted selves. Just like me wanting to speak out and help with porn addictions is one aspect of my life I'm not ashamed of, it taught me a lot, but I don't generally go around discussing it and saying it's everything that makes me, me.

But then ya know most would just call me a a big headed bigot for saying those last few sentences I guess.

I mean I'm a young person and this is about love they tell me. I should totally understand.

And that's where I'm really ticked off. I do totally understand.

See when did we decide to let the government tell us who and what we can love? If the Supreme Court ruled tonight that I couldn't love my dog I still totally would. Or if they told me I had to hate all Italians, I'd still love my friends of Italian descent.

See, this isn't about love. This is about law. I'm not here to dictate to anyone who they should or shouldn't love or hate. And the government shouldn't be either.

They were ruling about the law not our love lives.

A law about whether or not kids should have a parent of both sexes. A law about whether people should be forced to perform ceremonies against their wills or not. A law about forcing people, all people - families, schools, businesses -  to conform to teaching and viewing a family in a whole different light.

And while it's all very well for me to make whatever choice I want about my love life and you to make whatever choice you want about your love life... I think it's unfair to make that choice for someone else too. Like the kids. They have rights too. It's my personal opinion that the helpless, the underage, and weaker of society should actually have more rights protecting their liberties than us who are over legal age. We are called "responsible adults" for a reason. Yes, I'm very weird like that.  I think they should be allowed to have a chance, an opportunity to interact with a man and a woman figure in their early lives. Then if they want to later make the choice to be heterosexual or homosexual it's their choice. But I will fight for the right that they should at least have a chance to interact with a mom and a dad as a female and male. They have a right to an opportunity of experiencing two very different types of parents - male and female. This is not a right we can just take from them because it would make it more convenient for us.

Yes, I'm very bizarre like that.

Shout at me. Tell me how unfeeling I am. But don't accuse me of taking away your rights because I believe no one should tell anyone who or what they should love. Except for God. And I'm not God. Neither are you for that matter. I just think the kids should get that right. Because I've seen the grown up products of those kids that didn't. Because I've read and listened to their voices. Because this isn't about what I want as a full grown, able to fend for myself, adult. The bone I'm picking has to do with the ones that are not full grown and cannot fend for themselves but are subject to being affected by whatever our whims, now backed by government sanction, can do.

On a side note, I also think that someone performing ceremonies should retain the right to only perform those they feel comfortable performing. I think  someone who has grown up being forbidden to harbor homosexual sentiments suddenly forced to perform a ceremony that every fiber of their being disagrees with is not establishing freedom but rather putting one's freedom above another's.

And I think we should all be given grace, mercy, and the benefit of the doubt if we don't understand each other's excitement or aversion to the ruling today.

I know where I stand. I know why - the thought process, the rationality, the moral ground, and the emotion - that has led me to this position. I do not judge you if your position is different from mine.

But please, please, please in the name of equality and justice and rights for all, don't accuse me of digging my nose in your personal business and saying the law should dictate you can't love who you want when you want. I am only arguing that the law should never throw out one set of people's rights for another group's rights. And that is precisely what we are doing with this act. And what we did with Roe v. Wade. In each case, we're throwing out the rights of the weak and the underage and the ones with the littlest strength in their voices due to their youth and station in life in the name of equality.

There is no new equality now. There is just a swap of freedoms. The children will not be able to argue for many years now. Or they will be stifled out of respect for their parents or loved ones. Or drowned by the media's attention to making sure only "politically correct" victims are allowed to go viral. Because lets face it, victims speaking out make us awkward. Especially, ones we'd rather not face exist. I know. I've been a victim.

Dear Rainbow Flag constituent, I'm sorry you were wronged, are wronged. I'm sorry you have suffered pain. I really am. And as you cross my path I will not shove you away. I will love you in Christ. I will accept you as an equal human being deserving of treatment, love, and respect as such whether or not we agree on all issues.

But please my fellow victim if you have been victimized, stripped of rights or terribly wronged, for I too am a victim of abuse although perhaps for different reasons, see that there are victims on every side.

And I will always take the quietest, most suppressed side. I will always take the children's side no matter what I personally may desire for myself. I am a teacher, a tutor, a children's advocate. Whether that's fighting the abuse of a physically abusive father, bandaging the wounds of a broken home, or advocating for each child to have an opportunity at having two different sex parents, I'll be there fighting that battle.

Please join me, constituents of both flags. Please join me in reaching out to the children, in giving them a better life. In making laws that will protect what is in their best interests even if they go against the grain of our desires.

The law is not about what or who you love. It should be about protection and the rights of all.

P.S. if you're interested in the actual stories of real life kids, start here: http://thefederalist.com/2015/03/17/dear-gay-community-your-kids-are-hurting/

https://www.lifesitenews.com/news/quartet-of-truth-adult-children-of-gay-parents-testify-against-same-sex-mar

http://www.americanthinker.com/articles/2015/06/what_life_is_like_when_children_of_gay_couples_dont_matter.html#.VaAk7ak0t8o.twitter

http://cnsnews.com/news/article/lauretta-brown/adults-raised-gay-couples-speak-out-against-gay-marriage-federal-court

"Why me? Why us, God?" - When it all falls apart

"You may think that I'm just fine. 
How could anything ever be out of line?
I take my time to set the stage
Make sure everything's in place.
Even though I've got the lines rehearsed
A picture only paints a thousand words." -  "Behind the Scenes"

Sometimes it's so weird.... the very idea of a dream dying is so painful it becomes unthinkable. I force myself to think of it, to come to grips with it, because I fear not coming to grips with it. It's as though in this painful, mixed up, unpredictable world I have a great need to know what my reaction will be. As if I think what I should say or do enough times it will actually turn out.

Funny how a girl like me should have so much trouble facing the dying of a dream. Me, that stared death in the eye so many times. That has seen the finger of mortality touch those I love best exposing the physical weakness of the strongest soul.

I'm even warned that this dream is going to die unless there's some major miracle.

And I keep forcing myself to think through what I'll do when it all falls apart finally.

Oddly enough it is oftentimes here where we are left on the precipice that saw or is to see the demise of our low no matter how high mortal dream that we grow angry with God. Oh how many times have I been guilty of this! How incredible, when one steps back and thinks about it, it is to shake one's fist at and question the One Great Almighty. The One Who, unlike us, is not limited by time, space, circumstance, bias, selfishness, and impure motives. He alone knows what was in eternity past. He alone knows what time will span. He alone can see eternity future. Only God our Savior can care deeply enough to have planned our lives without an ounce of impure intention.

Bowed down, humbled at this thought I can face the very possible demise of my beautiful dream better. I am still an artist who feels the torture of seeing one's chief work, so many cherished hopes of great things centered on burned before one's eyes. I am as yet not fully transformed though by and by I shall be thanks to the Master Artist. That is the hope, the stay, the reward - in short the reason to keep plodding even on the most miserable days. Knowing I am a part of His work, the greatest Artist's piece, is enough. I am His masterpiece (Ephesians 2:10). And that my friends, fills me with hope.

Well the demise of my dream did not come today after all. It was instead another piece of news. So unexpected in fact my mind is reeling and my soul even more so. No doubt it will make it's way onto this blog as well once I have regained enough ability to think if only rambling trails in the hope of making sense of it.

But even still, or rather because of it, I see how powerful, big, and omniscient God is and I am humbled and repentant for ever asking, "Why God, why me, why us?"